Why Narcissists Devalue Everything About You

The gist

1. Narcissists can make people feel fear and incompetence within milliseconds without saying anything directly, a process therapists call counter-transference.
2. People around narcissists often over-perform and over-deliver, trying to prove themselves in response to implied but never stated disapproval.
3. Williamson says this behavior can count as intentional abuse even when the narcissist is not fully aware they are doing it.
4. The main defense is noticing when you feel insecure or incompetent with one specific person but not in other relationships.